June 05, 2003
Millions of dogs named Spike have launched a class action suit against director Spike Lee, alleging that the terminally petulant filmmaker misappropriated the name "Spike" in an attempt to associate himself with tough canines. Retired veteran Warner Brothers character actor Spike explains:
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The good Spike, not the little freak Spike who thinks everything's about him |
I've spent over fifty years beating up Sylvester the Puddy Tat until he saw stars and tiny birds circling his head, and I will be god-damned if some whiny little bitch, and that's what Spike Lee is, a self-obsessed whiny little bitch, is going to borrow that cachet so he can bully his way to the head of the line at the men's fragrance counter. Uh-uh, no way, no how. I'd pummel him with a baseball bat or drop an anvil or piano on him before I'd let that happen.
When asked for comment, legal representation for Lee Jeans had little to say other than, "Yeah, Spike's not really the kind of image we've been going for. Legally speaking, eeewwww." Lee Meriwether, known for portraying such fabulous babes as Lily Munster and Catwoman, declined to comment other than with angry hissing.
In the meantime, Spike (the dog, not the pompous little auteur) is reportedly also considering some sort of legal action against fetishists who, in his words, have "misappropriated the spiked leather collar look and associated it with unwholesome stuff that has nothing to do with beating up cats."
Posted by Steve at June 5, 2003 01:59 PM
When I was young, the boy next door (Stanley) and I were cabin building demons. Give us some scraps of wood and a dime for some nails, and up would go a magnificant edifice. One was two stories, with bunk beds and those doors that you can open the top half only if you want. All built by us, no adults at all.
I confess that in our rush to secure large pieces of lumber in a manner that would keep them together forever, we used items we called "spikes". I regret the error and retroactively determine that they should have been called "Sheltons", a good name and one that is clearly not in use. I am also e-mailing my contacts working for a number of railroads to advise them to do the same. And, my friends who teach American History are being alerted that it was the "Golden Shelton" that was driven in, uniting the country by rail, in Brigham City, Utah on May 10, 1869. The 384 owners of dogs named Spike who have pictures that show up in a Google search are on their own, however.
the blog entry
I guess some rules in vollyball need to be changed as well.
Not to mention the people who have those pointy hairstyles.
What about that novel written about 20 years ago with a plot about taking a reporter's story and keeping it from getting published?
One of the stories about the late, lamented executive editor of the NYT was that he kept a couple of columnists from publishing columns about the whole Augusta golf club flap. Maybe Mr. Lee should sue him for "spiking" those stories.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAhahahaaaaaaaaaaa.......
Stop it. Yer killin' me.
Well, since Mr. Lee did not sue Joss Whedon 6 years ago, could TNN argue that he's too late?
The Golden Shelton is unnecessary. American history, as it is taught today, rarely teaches something as imperialistic as completing a railroad across land we had no business invading and the fact that the Shelton was placed in Utah, where hardly anyone shows anmy cultural diversity, just makes it worse.
